4 Things You Shouldn’t Do When Your Child Throws A Tantrum (Part 1)

baby crying while on her tummy

Learning how to “best” manage your child’s temper tantrums can make you search for all sorts of strategies–Googling about it, asking other parents and seeking your own parents’ (and grandparents’) advice. However, I’ll bet that none of those would work as well as you wish it would.

The truth is, there is no “secret” or “magic solution” to handling your child or toddler, especially when they’re throwing a major tantrum. The only person who can tell you what to do is you. That’s right! Only experience and trial and error–combined with your intuition, strengths and values–will present you with methods that work and don’t work so you can keep in mind what you can use in the future.

However, it’s also just as important to note what not to do when parenting a tantruming child. This way, you’ll know what you should be doing and, at the same time, can avoid any pitfalls that might come along the way.

Watch out for these don’ts in dealing with a tantruming toddler:

Be flexible. 

You might find this piece of advice a little ironic, especially once you realize just how inflexible toddlerhood can be. What all parents should remember is that tantrums are a normal part of any child’s development, therefore we shouldn’t be too impatient about it. It’s very common for parents to eventually lose their cool and think that by being even more strict on their child is a good idea. The result? An even more frustrating tug-of-war between a frustrated parent and a strong-willed child.

The secret here is to be flexible–give your child more choices, so as to give her a sense of control in her rule-oriented world. Provide choices for issues that are not really important, such as clothes she’d prefer to wear to school, what to have for breakfast and who to bring with her in bed. Be in charge while allowing your child to practice her individuality and independence.

Don’t be too flexible.

Before you get confused, here’s the simple explanation. Allowing yourself to be too flexible might make your child think that he or she can take control over you and your rules. All the choice giving from #1 could easily backfire and you might end up letting your child call the shots on more important things, such as her daily schedule and healthy food options.

Remember that toddlers (until they’re bigger children) need a parent–someone who can take charge and is able to control their temper, unlike them. Don’t forget to still set boundaries and be consistent with things like routines, which make every child feel safe and secure in her suddenly all-too-emotional world.

(Continue reading this article HERE.)




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